1st Dose- The Past Is The Road To The Future

People believe in the love at the first sight. So do I. Even though everything on my surface is trying to tell everyone that I am an "anti-romantism", I really am not. In fact, I grow quite fond of it. I have this kind of bad attitude, I am easy to admire one's beauty, and somehow I just cannot rid of it. Even so, I am not easily to be fallen in love with a girl. Love is something special, so special and far outclassing the feeling of awe and admire, albeit admiring someone will give the same sensation as loving someone, however momentary. 

I never been in love in my primary level education, although I have secretly admired a few of my classmates, one of them is the top-student in my class, which I have the ability to contact her until the present time. However, able to contact does not mean that I will contact her. In fact, I will never contact her and really hope that this separation will last forever. Why? I am only a fool when I first fell in a "mini-love" with her. A pathetic curious child, period.

Things will never always be the same throughout the passages in life. The surrounding keeps changing, and the ever-changing and unrelenting shift of surrounding will bring about an evolution in the hearts and minds of humans. You can see the my point if you compare yourself now and yourself in the past. Sometimes you will curse that childish past of you, keep regretting of small trivial things and wrong turns that you have made through the course of your life.

"Oh, I really wish that I do that."

That sentence must be familiar to you. In fact, it is a cliche. 

Time is like an evolution machine. As you pass through that indefinite dimension, your thoughts, your perspective and your physical change. My heart, too. I start experiencing the so-called love at the age of 13, in my first year of secondary school. Being a boring shy guy, I don't bother to look at the girls for the first time. Until I start noticing a unique name from the class register; Claudia Riviera.

"Can you show me who is this girl? She got a real nice name." I asked one of my fellows.

Finger pointed. Oh, so it is her. Even though I mentioned "love at the first sight" before, but no thanks.

It is like a tradition in my country to do a monthly test. I don't really fond of monthly tests and whatsoever, because I cannot unleash my true potential in it. Why? It's just because I don't really give it a damn. I don't study for monthly tests. In fact, never. Ironically, I still pursue the top position in my class. Without a single page of book read and with a mind supplied with vague knowledge that I barely remember, I answered the test. It's quite easy, surprisingly. Now the result is out. I'm ranked second. Wow, not impressive at all. A bad habit is a bad habit. So I don't decide to tell the whole class that I got second without studying and unsatisfied about it. It will seem to try to trample the morale of those who ranked lower than me. Putting all those self-satisfaction issues aside, who is the first?

"Number 1- Claudia Riviera"

Oh, that girl with unusual name. So she's smart, eh? Looks like she will be the ultimate obstacle for me to achieve my senseless self-satisfaction.